It’s practically guaranteed that LNP Leader Peter Dutton will become our Prime Minister at the next federal election

By Cliff Reece

This follows recent polling that identified 61% of Australia’s voters stated they will vote for the Liberal-National Party coalition at the coming election.

Dutton’s personal approval rating has also risen to 61% whilst current PM Tony Albanese has dropped to just 18%, slightly ahead of Penny Wong on 16% and Chris ‘Blackouts’ Bowen on 2%.

This remarkable turnaround in support follows the release of the LNP’s 5-Year Plan should they be elected.

Among the many innovative and bold objectives of their plan are the following:

1. Funding of all ‘climate emergency’ Net Zero projects will cease immediately following the election. The Net Zero objective will also be totally abandoned.

This follows irrefutable evidence that human-created CO2 is not the problem it is claimed to be by left-wing climate activists in conjunction with industrialists who have a vested commercial interest in the renewables-saving-the-planet myth.

2. The money currently being wasted on wind and solar pipe dreams will instead be invested in defence and national security, the annual budget for which will be increased from the current 2% to 4% of GDP.

3. The money spent on defence and national security will be allocated to practical measures that will add immediate value to Australia’s defence capabilities – not in 10 years’ time when it might be all too late!

4. A Royal Commission into Indigenous Funding and Neglect will also commence immediately following the election. This will have a wide remit aimed at clearly establishing what exactly has been achieved with the billions of dollars spent by Indigenous groups in the past.

A National Audit of Indigenous Funding will also be conducted in parallel to the Royal Commission. It will be tasked with following the money trail and establishing just where all the money went given that it obviously did not get to the people who need it most.

The Royal Commission will also identify key areas of neglect within Indigenous communities and what can be done to ‘close the gap’. Child sexual abuse will be a key element in this investigation.

The Commission will be required to report its findings within 12 months from commencement and their report will be made available to the public within 7 days and no redactions will be permitted.

Other objectives included in the LNP 5-Year Plan – notably those related to substantial cuts in bureaucratic red tape and the cost-of-living crisis – can be viewed on the Liberal Party and National Party websites.

Public response to these announcements has been very positive.

Several people have remarked on the amazing similarity between the opinion poll’s 61% approval ratings for both the LNP and Peter Dutton and the 61% ‘No’ vote on PM Albanese’s race-based and divisive Voice referendum. As one observer queried, “Surely it’s more than a mere coincidence?”

Needless to say, the current government has been traumatized by the polling results.

Prime Minister Tony Albanese immediately announced that he will be shortly heading off to Israel for a charm offensive with the Israeli government. He noted that his policy is not to discuss domestic issues whilst out of the country.

Unfortunately, Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu has advised that he will not be available to meet with our PM as he has other more important matters to attend to such as eliminating terrorists who kill, rape, behead, burn alive, abduct and hold hostage innocent civilians.

Our Foreign Minister, Penny Wong, will be joining the PM and has undertaken to spend a week on an Israeli kibbutz so that she can, “Better understand the Israeli and Jewish situation and how Australia can better assist them in their continuing struggle for survival.”

While they are overseas, Energy Minister Chris ‘Blackouts’ Bowen will be spending time on the speaking circuit encouraging people to buy EVs before they increase still further in cost.

“Now is the time to buy a planet-saving EV before they become totally unaffordable due to higher rare mineral and battery costs,” he said.  

It’s understood that he won’t be mentioning that insurance companies are increasing premiums on EVs and even starting to decline coverage due to electric cars being far more expensive to repair and the fact that they are often written off after collisions because of the complexity and cost of repairing their battery packs.

“That’s just more lies spread by those uneducated ‘No’ to Voice supporters,’” he said.

Needless to say, apart from the penultimate paragraph, any connexion between this article and reality is purely coincidental. It’s a classic case of misinformation! 😉

But wouldn’t it be wonderful if it were all to become true?