Some have asked what I'm going to be doing in retirement. 

Well, I applied for a building permit for a new house. It was going to be 100 ft tall and 400 ft wide, with 12 gun turrets at various heights, and windows all over the place, an Olympic size swimming pool, a loud outside entertainment sound system that was going to entertain the whole neighbourhood. It would have parking for 200 plus cars and I want to paint it bog green with pink trim.  

The Council told me; “Forget  it… IT AIN 'T GONNA HAPPEN!”  How unfriendly is that?
So, I sent in the application again, but this time I called it a 'mosque'.  
Work starts on Monday.  

I just love Green councils!

 

(unknown author)